Hello, my name is Ennio, and I’ve been married to Jonathan for a year today.
This is #Jonnio’s first wedding anniversary!
As an avid reader, I always preferred the stories that started in the middle, when characters had history to unravel. So, this is my excuse for only giving a brief introduction about who we are.
I’m a 29-year-old writer who’s never published anything but that is coming to terms with the fact that being a writer doesn’t mean you need to earn money through it, but at the same time give me all the moneys because it shines and momma likes her wine.
Jonathan is a 26-year-old software engineer who’s beyond his years and makes the cutest angry faces, which is why I tease him constantly; because all love is rooted in chaos.
We met online January 8th 2012 on a dating site called OkCupid. I didn’t think he’d ever reply to my message (Hey! You’ve got a beautiful smile!) in part because people never do online, and in part because I was a Venezuelan student living in Germany, and he was a Welsh student living in Wales.
But he did.
And what followed was 2 years of difficult moments for both of us, that I may or may not explore in the future, before I could move to the UK and we could start dating in a healthy way.
We knew instantly that our chemistry was strong; we hated the same things, but figuring out if a relationship is real or not when it starts online is hard. There’s a lot you find out about a person when you physically date them, and later on, when and if you move in together.
Flash forward from September 2014 – when we started living together – to July 2017. We had been dealing with a lot of problems to get married, both personal and legal. You see, on top of being a pair of dashing homosexuals we are also of different races and nationalities.
“That’s irrelevant,” I hear your brain saying.
Well, yes, but not to the governments of the world that decided to draw up imaginary lines all over the planet that sometimes can hinder whether or not two people can be allowed to love each other in peace.
But, luckily for us, we persevered. And I say lucky because there’s a lot of people in our situation right now that don’t have half of what we did to make the simple thing of “living together safely” a reality. And that’s probably something I’m also going to address in another post.
For now, let’s end this first introductory post with three things I learned during this first year of marriage.
First, you must be ready for people to question everything you do threefold now that you’re married. From future plans to the way you handle your relationship. Everyone is a critic, and they think they have a say in how you do things just because they exist in the vicinity of your life.
Second, is the fact that some people won’t like you now that you’re married. And that’s ok. It’s their choice. You don’t have to apologise to anyone for loving the person you love. And this can manifest in friends, family, et cetera. For a bunch of different reasons; racism, homophobia, xenophobia and so on. Don’t let others get in your head.
And thirdly, if you married someone you truly love, who truly understands you and supports you, it creates one of the most wonderful safe zones you could ever imagine. But that also means your fears about losing it magnify, and it’s not about jealousy or being left, but massively unexpected changes like an accident, a terminal illness, or death. Especially if you’ve suffered loss of that kind in your life before.
So that’s it for now, congratulations to us, we’ve made it through one year. In Hollywood we’d be an ancient couple already. If you liked anything in particular that I briefly mentioned here and want me to elaborate, let us know!
You can find us on social media (and that’s most likely where you found this) as @hashtagjonnio in most things. Or just google Jonnio and I’m sure our half naked bodies will be the top results.
Until next time! :3